My fourth article is for all people out there who are afraid to do something they'd love to do. I was always a brilliant guy. First time I've seen my name in a magazine was when I was 12 years old, and it was because of my brain and original concepts of games I was creating.
A long, long time ago back when I was 12, I was always shy. Even later on. Shy because I always wanted to do more for my life, but I thought people might not like my books. People might like my music. And mostly my best mates were against. They thought I'm crazy. Sometimes I had felt like my mates are with me only because there was always loads of beautiful girls next to me and because they were shy to talk to them, it was easier to be next to me, because I'm really not shy at all and if I think something, I'm able to say it quickly.
Well, this article isn't about the girls or whatever I'm writing about over here. It's about courage. I would love to tell you how I felt before I went to the studio. I wasn't confident enough. I had lyrics. I was practising at home. But I said to myself that I don't have to be perfect, but I have to start if I wanna be perfect one day. So I went and recorded Friday night and one night. The easiest songs I wrote down. It was quite a success, and everyone was wondering. Even me. It was my dream!
After long years I decided to chase it, and I've got it. Later on the iTunes, Spotify, Amazon and all those shops came over, and I've got Global distribution deal. I still remember asking my boss Ben if I could print those papers off. When I discovered myself on iTunes, I just had to do silly video because I was so happy and excited about it!
When I first have seen pictures from Jirina Kantova and Thomas Cat, I was so amazed! They are honestly the best photographers I ever met, and the work with them is such a fantastic experience that I can only recommend to everyone who'd love to have amazing pictures to talk to them. And I hardly believed as well that the guy on the images is me.
When I arrived in the UK and started again, I hardly believed that I was dreaming about it all my life and now I've got it. When I first stepped into the wrestling ring, I couldn't think as well... I was crying in one session because one wrestler told me, that finally after them years I'm finally between my family, between people, where I belong. And yeah, that made me cry. It was my dream for 13 years.
It's just me talking about dreams and how it all felt for me. Well. I realised what made me get the things I wanted. I just had the balls to go and do what I wanted to do. I had to say myself, fuck what everyone else thinks about me, I'm gonna do whatever is making me happy, whatever I want to do and even if there'd be loads of people against me or hate me, I'd still do whatever I want to do because I want to leave something after me.
And how does it all feel now? I have to finish everything I started. 20.11. I have my birthday, and I told myself I'd love to have all my RED EVIL books out as same as my first TO THE TOP music album out. My sense and the reason why I do all is just to cheer up people and give them self confidence they need to follow their own dreams.
Once I will get on VEVO, and my album will be done, I'd love to promo my music in one music club, and it really doesn't matter where. I'd just like to know how does it feel to be in front of the crowd and do what I always wanted to do. Every day I'm watching the pictures I posted up on the wall, and I'm asking myself, what I have done for this...
And that's what you have to do as well. If you have a dream, put it on the wall. Don't just look at it. Ask yourself every day, what have you done for it. Well. I haven't done anything yet but I will. Step by step. And guess how I feel... I feel nervous. I can imagine myself being there because I'm a clown, but on the other side, if people won't like my music, I'd be well ashamed.
But, do you know why? There isn't any worst feeling than sleep in a car, being homeless and get questions like, explain. What are you doing here? Your car doesn't have MOT. You don't have road tax. And so on...
I felt so embarrassed that even if I'd walk away from the club hated, I will be happy. Happy, because I made another step towards the things I really want. And that's all we have to do. Lose our fears and just go, go for whatever we want. And that's all my video and article about. The winners, they are people who never gave up on anything!
Me... I'm about to finish all my books and music... I have to sort myself out, and I'm back in a wrestling ring, and I'd try to perform in the clubs around the UK as well and promo my work. I would love to be famous and do what I like to do. And well, if you're one of those asking me why I'm working in McDonald's. I think it's one of the best companies to work in and I've met so many amazing people and girls that I'm just and only grateful that I am working where I am working. I have tried other jobs, and I'm finding them, and it isn't something I'd love to do.
However, I know where I belong, and I have balls. Balls to say that I'd get what I want and I will be damn good!
Do you have the balls to go for whatever you want?!!